[freelancer]

Hi all,can I have abit of C & C on:

[Greg Findley]

Hi Ben,

IMO I think its a bit too busy, there's a lot of information on the page, the bulk of which is black text. I would suggest stripping that back to encourage visitors to explore the site to find out more. A prime example of this is your 'handy list' of services, consisting of no less than 48 bullet points, just name the main services and say 'Find out about our full range of design services' as a link.

In a similar manner the news stories you have are taking up too much space, take them back to headline form with one or two line snippets to entice the viewer to click and read more.

I'm not sure if some of the content included will be final content, but you might want to think about some of the copy, for example, 'Dont ring us' is very negative, why not try something more conventional like 'Call me back' as it is a direct call to action. Another example is 'Interested? Get a free no obligation quote...' to me that sounds very conservatories and window company like, why not try something more specific to your audience like 'Send us your design brief'.

Hope some of that helps,
Greg

[Indizine]

If you are going to be sticking testimonial credits to Claire Brown the Copywriter why isnt she doin the page copy?

[freelancer]

Originally Posted by Indizine

If you are going to be sticking testimonial credits to Claire Brown the Copywriter why isnt she doin the page copy?

She's working on it as we speak

[freelancer]

Originally Posted by Greg Findley

Hi Ben,

IMO I think its a bit too busy, there's a lot of information on the page, the bulk of which is black text. I would suggest stripping that back to encourage visitors to explore the site to find out more. A prime example of this is your 'handy list' of services, consisting of no less than 48 bullet points, just name the main services and say 'Find out about our full range of design services' as a link.

In a similar manner the news stories you have are taking up too much space, take them back to headline form with one or two line snippets to entice the viewer to click and read more.

I'm not sure if some of the content included will be final content, but you might want to think about some of the copy, for example, 'Dont ring us' is very negative, why not try something more conventional like 'Call me back' as it is a direct call to action. Another example is 'Interested? Get a free no obligation quote...' to me that sounds very conservatories and window company like, why not try something more specific to your audience like 'Send us your design brief'.

Hope some of that helps,
Greg

Thanks Gregg, going to cut it back like you said, on reflection I agree its way too busy. Content wise its not finalised at all, claire is rewriting it as we speak.

Once coded I am going to be using Textpattern as the CMS though, my current site is static and its a pain in la derriere to update 9and thus it gives me an excuse not to )

Thanks everyone

[Mike]

I agree, too much text.

The design itself is nice and I do like the look of it.


Think about what your potential customers want to see straight off and what they would be happy to dig for.

[Arleigh]

The design is nice and I like its color scheme because it looks professional. Though the content has so many text..

[freelancer]

ccoool thanks for C & C. Can I just ask, how far did people read / scan / look till they thought.... I'm off somewhere less textual?

[Mike]

End of the first client for me

[Louise]

I actually really like the overall design, but agree it's way too busy. I stopped reading after the first client - sorry .

I actually really like your 'what we do...' box in blue. I know it's a lot of black text, so maybe see if you can make it any easier on the eye, but I hate having to search to find out what a company does (or doesn't do), so your site would get a big thumbs up from me. Personally, I'd be more interested in that list than the client testimonials (though I'd probably look for those too after I'd decided that you could do what I was looking for), so I'd switch these round in the order you've got them. I'd also lose the whitehead and walkers testimonials and just have a link to a 'more happy customers' or 'more case studies' page or something.

I do like it though & would like to see it once you've finished it - good luck!

Louise